A Lesson for All

The tone of this entry will likely sound as though it is ridden with machismo and testosterone. Understand that is not the intent, as I will (hopefully) demonstrate in a few paragraphs later the redeeming value of this article. Please keep in mind as you read this that I am a generally easy-going guy with a jovial outlook on life.


Fresh back from a solo weekend trip to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, Cathy, after she picked me up at the airport, and I decided to try a restaurant in our town that we had not previously visited. We ate our Italian fare before jumping into the car to drive home. Cathy mentioned that she needed to go to the store and asked that I go with her. Knowing how much I love going grocery shopping, I sluggishly pointed the car toward the store and gingerly pressed the gas pedal.


After purchasing our items, we sauntered toward our car, which I had parked at the back of the lot because of the number of other people who apparently had the same idea as we did. Cathy often laughs at me because my eyes are constantly scanning our surroundings. Call me paranoid if you wish, but I prefer to think of myself as one who has a heightened sense of situational awareness.


Parked next to our car was a black Chevy Silverado pick-up truck, complete with a large American flag standing proudly on a pole that was mounted in the center of the truck's bed. Plastered on the back windows were various decals, the most prominent being a rendition of a Confederate flag--usually a tell-tale sign of someone with little or no hope at being successful in this life. Now, before some of my Confederate loving friends levy hatred on yours truly, let me assure you that my great-great grandfather served in the Alabama forty-ninth infantry division of the CSA, so my ties to that time period are direct. I do not run from my history, but that does not mean I have to appreciate the newest perversion of that flag that many have embraced (usually those with little historical context).


Standing next to the truck was its owner, a man roughly my size, wearing a black t-shirt and camouflaged pants. After all, nothing says "I love grocery shopping" like wearing forest print. Next to him was a portly woman with blond-ish hair, presumably his wife. This is where it started to get a little interesting.


I watched as this "gentleman" glared at Cathy, my wife of Asian decent who stands roughly five feet tall. Next, he turned his attention to me and attempted the same glare. All of this was processed in my mind in a matter of a nano-second. The truck, the stereotypical outfit, the flags, et al. I realized I was dealing with someone who felt his skin tone made him superior in some bizarre way. What he did not realize at that moment in time is that my body had suddenly gone into attack mode, my heart rate actually dropped, and mental crosshairs were already on his torso positioned exactly where I intended to attack had he elected to make a ridiculous move.


My eyes locked on his, and as he tried to intimidate me, I recall talking to myself, repeating the phrase, "Breathe, breathe." Controlling my breath and heart rate when a dump of adrenalize falls into my gut has always been something my body has done. All the years I spent bouncing in bars and trading hands with those who allowed the alcohol, and whatever else they ingested make decisions for them, gave me a profound advantage in stressful situations.


My gaze followed his as he continued to walk. Was he thinking of saying or doing something? Possibly, but something on his face changed and he continued walking toward the store. I exhaled then popped the trunk of the car where I deposited the items we purchased. I turned my head one last time and watched as the tough guy walked through the automatic doors and disappeared inside the shop.


Cathy and I got inside the car and began driving away. She remarked to me, "Did you see that guy staring at me?" Unaware of the soundless discussion the man and I shared, I replied, "I sure did."


I recalled for her the little stare down the gentleman and I shared to which she replied, "He was obviously a white supremacist."


"Yeah, and not a smart one either," I said.


Why detail this little episode for you, the reader? Because I want to stress the importance of a few things!


1.) Do not show or feel fear in the face of someone attempting to intimidate you. Chances are the individual knows little about much and is merely trying to scare you.


2.) Control your emotions and remain focused on the situation. Protect your loved ones at all costs.


3.) Be prepared to rain down extreme violence when necessary.


Cathy (and my beautiful Mom) will be the first to tell you about the impact she (Cathy) has had on me. In my younger days, I would not hesitate to engage with someone like this fellow, but my lovely wife does not approve of me losing my composure. I work hard to maintain her approval even when I feel the old me creeping in.


All that said, I have levied my rage at men before, and have no qualms doing so again should the need arise. Fortunately for this guy that was not required, and I am happy for it. The thought of Cathy's disapproval is much worse for me than sitting in a dank jail cell.


My final thoughts on this episode are simply to reiterate what I wrote above. Do not allow anyone to gain entry into your mind and heart without your own consent. Remain in control of yourself and do not allow adrenaline to take over. This is difficult to do, but with some training it can be managed. Lastly, as a last resort, do not hesitate to inflict violence on someone intent on doing the same to you or a loved one. I do not, and I will not.

Pray for peace, but prepare for battle.

An Adventure to be Had

In just over a month, Cathy and I will climb aboard an airplane en route to the Far East for a second time as a married couple. We will be staying in Hong Kong before taking a hop to Bangkok Thailand. For the first time in several years, I am excited about a plane ride and a visit to a foreign land.

Several years ago we flew to Seoul, South Korea then into Manila, The Philippines. After a few days in Manila we jumped on a plane to Hong Kong. We did a tour of Bruce Lee's former city, suffered from an illness, and boarded the Turbo Jet to Macau, the Las Vegas of Asia.

During out stay in these Chinese lands we experienced life on a scale not understood by those who have not had the opportunity to leave their own borders. I saw what real poverty is, beyond the scope of American "poor." I witnessed a county that forbade the use of four wheeled automobiles without issuance from the government, which made itself the most two-wheeled traveled country in the world.

The Philippines is home to millions of people on seven thousand plus islands. Some of the nicest, most humble individuals in the world walk their streets, despite a lack of industry to support a populace in need of work. I cannot stress enough the beauty of the Filipinos and the glorious landscape that makes up their country.

Cathy and I then traveled to Tokyo, Japan where we experienced a culture romanticized in American movies (and for good reason). Japan is a country where politeness is expected and rudeness shunned. I watched thousands of people walk around without bumping into one another, and once, while standing in a store, a lady asked my forgiveness for standing next to me as she looked at an item on a store shelf. Can you imagine?

As I said earlier, we are both excited about our upcoming trip; I am most excited about traveling to Thailand and experiencing the sites, smells, and lifestyle of the Thai people. Experiencing how others live and operate within their own country's boundaries is what I most enjoy. Yes, I'm certain I will do "touristy" stuff, but my focus is always on the people of the land.

More to follow...