Buddah believer??

As I was having some after dinner discussion with a work colleague last night, our bar tender insisted on trying to start a political discussion.  She, the bartender, proudly proclaimed a.) her age (28), b.) her very liberal political allegiance, and c.) her "Buddah belief." 

Now, most who know me realize I'm pretty quick to jump into a political debate, but I refrained last night.  I didn't care about the bartender's age and really had no desire to even talk to her at all, as my discussion revolved more around work and family and such with Jason (my work colleague).

But the lass intrigued me with her proclamation of being a Buddha believer, but not necessarily a buddhist. 

"What exactly is a Buddha believer," I asked?

She rambled on about not necessarily believing in reincarnation but she did believe in the belief of reincarnation.

"Huh?"

She restated exactly what she had just attempted to explain.

"That made no sense whatsoever," I remarked.  "In fact, that may be the dumbest thing I've heard all day," I said to her.

Obviously angered by my response, she attempted again to explain her religious beliefs.

And here is what sent her over the edge:

"Listen, you are standing there telling us you are some kind of liberal and a Buddha believer, whatever that is.  You talk about rich people sharing their wealth with people who didn't do anything to deserve or earn it.   But what I'm here to tell you is Buddha was a one percenter."

"NO HE WASN'T," she exclaimed!

"Yes he was.  And I'll prove my point.  He was a fat little bastard and ate everything.  Apparently he didn't share much food, so I say he was a one percenter."

She was aghast at my retort and went on to tell me that the Buddha would actually go for quite some time without eating so he would have to be thin.

"No, he was a fat bastard and I have the statue at home to prove it.  He was a little fat dude."

Flabbergasted she stormed away while everyone else sitting around pointed and laughed at her.

I love winning a debate.

Celebrating life-twenty years removed

This day has weighed heavily upon my heart for quite some time now.  You see, today marks the twentieth anniversary of my father's passing.  I've run the gammet of emotions over the past several months--I've felftfor my dad whose life was taken too soon; I've felt for his family who was left to grieve his passing, and I've had my own self-indulged pity party at my dad's expense because there's so much I wanted to share with him. 

I remember the day he died like it was yesterday--my mom knocking on my door, tears streaming down her cheeks after being notified that she needed to get to the hospital "right now," me holding Courtney when Mom stormed into my apartment to tell me what had transpired, and the utter shock I felt when she told me what had happened.  I remember driving as fast as my mom's car would go all the way to the hospital, and finally the long drive to Nashville, Tennesse to tell my little brother that our dad was gone.

I remember diving into the abyss for quite some time, not realizing how I was affecting my family.  How I attempted to drink my sorrow away.  I remember how excited my oldest daughter would get at the sight of my dad--she was only five months old when he left this world.  I wish I could count the tears I shed over the years due to his passing and somehow explain the remorse I felt about our last discussion being an argument and not being able to tell him I loved him.  And even though I know he loved his boys more than life itself, somehow I always felt responsible for his untimely death--but why I felt this way I can't explain.

So today, on the twentieth year of his death, I thought about all the ways I would honor his passing.  I find myself in northern Florida, traveling on business--and I thought I would buy a rose and toss it into the Atlantic in rememberance of him--but then I thought about how frivolous that would be to him.

As I gathered myself and recalled how much Pops enjoyed life, I elected to celebrate life like he lived it; I decided to simply smile and laugh.  I thought about how much he liked being around people and how he fed off their energy and decided to do the same.  So today I simply walked around St. Augustine, Florida, taking in the sights and smells of one of my favorite towns.  And today I decided to just stop and talk to folks along the way.  I met a lady, a Cuban-American who had fled Cuba in the late 60's and who subsequently opened a cigar and wine shop, ironically about twnety years ago.  She is so full of energy and loves talking to her customers and talking about life when she was a child in her native land.  She speaks of the greatness of our country and the hopes that her homeland will one day be a reflection of the United States.  I thought about how much my dad would have liked talking to her, and even though he had a tough exterior, he was really a big ole teddy bear at heart.  He would have enjoyed speaking with her as I did.

So Dad, I miss you and I love you.  I wish you were here to see how well your grand daughters turned out.  Courtney is independent and headstrong like you, but she has a heart of gold and wants to do the right thing, even though she makes a lot of the mistakes I made along the way.

I wish you could have held Cassidy because she has the heart of a saint and that tempered personality you always put forth.  She has a way of looking at the world kind of like you did.

And I wish you were here to see Jeff--he's quite the man and father.

I wish you were here to see Mom--she's so happy, but I know she misses you so much.

And I wish you were here for me just to tell you I love you....because I always did.... and still do.

New Year's Resolutions

I hate making resolutions; usually I just set myself up to fail, and I hate failure.  But this year is different.  Why?  Well, the Mayans and Nostradamus (maybe?) told us the end of the world would occur in 2012, so I need to go out with a bang.  I don't want to be standing at the Pearly Gates with a notebook full of incompletes, so here's my 'to done' list for the year:

1. Get in shape, and not the shape of a pear.  With that said, I have to have a reason for getting in shape (a reason other than general health--how boring is that?), which takes me to resolution number two:

2. I will run in and finish the Warrior Dash this June.  This is a pretty huge task for me, as I have a shoulder injury which I have zero desire to have repaired because I remember how much the other repair sucked.  But I have a pretty high pain tolerance and an awesome wife who massages my shoulder on a regular basis.  Why would I want to give that up for a simple operation?
3. I'm going to finish the manuscript for my book and begin submitting to publishers.  What happens beyond that I have no control over, but I will have at least completed the manuscript. 

4.  I'm going to tell the people closest to me that I love them on a more frequent basis.  So, if hearing this sort of thing makes you nauseous, steer clear of me.

5.  I'm going to continue telling ridiculously stupid stories about things that happened to me and my friends because, well because they are funny.

6.  I'm going to make this work year an extremely productive one--just cause I can.

7.  I'm going to take my martial arts training to the next level.

8. I'm going to laugh a lot more because laughing makes me happy.

9.  I'm going to see old friends and make some new ones.

10.  I'm going to plan for my retirement now, because waiting until I retire is just a little to late to contemplate planning for it (at least in my book).