A Dream Less Deferred

As a few of you know I'm an aspiring writer.  I've been published a few times in some fairly popular mainstream magazines, but my real dream is to write a novel and have it brought to print.  I can't begin to explain my drive or motive for doing such.....it's not money or fame; after all, those two things are simply byproducts and fleeting at best. 

Perhaps it has more to do with my passion for expressing myself.  Certainly, if I were musically inclined I'd pursue that interest.  Music, for me at least, is something I've always been enamored with but unable to really "do."  Writing is at least a vehicle for articulating thoughts or dreams in a way that others might appreciate. 

I've been working on a manuscript for a little while now.  The storyline and theme are truly taking shape and I get more and more excited as I write.  Will it be accepted for publication when the time comes for me to submit it?  I have no idea.  What I do know is that Stephen King's first novel, Carrie, was reportedly rejected 150 times before getting picked up by a publishing house.  Now, I don't claim to have one tenth the artistic and writing capabilities of Mr. King, but his personal story at least offers some inspiration to a guy trying to follow in his footsteps. 

Over the past few months I've received some wonderful help and feedback from several people.  My wife Cathy has read a significant portion of what I've written and is excited about it.  For those who know her, you understand that she can be a tough critic, so her positive attitude has been instrumental in my continued push to finish the story.

My friend Thomas has provided some great direction for my protagonist.  As one who has spent a lot of time "over there," his help has been tantamount while I trudge through the mush and mud that are my thoughts.

Kevin has lent a large portion of himself in my protagonist's character development.  Our discussions have been full of insight and laughter and I appreciate everything he's done thus far, and what he continues to do in offering feedback and guidance.

Gary has been a huge motivation for me!  He told me over dinner a few months ago, and has reiterated to me on more than a few occasions, that "writing is re-writing."  I didn't fully understand what he meant by that statement until I began some moderate self-editing.  Several times I found myself asking, "Did I really write this crap?"  Yes, his advice has been spot on. 

But, as I began in this small post, I can't put my finger on why I continue to write and the motivation that has kept me focused on my manuscript for some time now.  Like I said, having a book published is a dream, so I guess that explanation will have to suffice for now until I figure out a way to better articulate it for those who might be interested.  For now, I'll offer only a short poem by Langston Hughes........his thoughts are my thoughts, better served by a man who understood drive and passion.......and expressed them in a beautifully succinct fashion.

Harlem

By Langston Hughes 1902–1967 

   

What happens to a dream deferred?

      Does it dry up

      like a raisin in the sun?

      Or fester like a sore—

      And then run?

      Does it stink like rotten meat?

      Or crust and sugar over—

      like a syrupy sweet?

      Maybe it just sags

      like a heavy load.

      Or does it explode?