If You Think You're Oppressed, You Should Unplug From The Internet

I am simultaneously amazed and appalled at the ludicrous "feelings" of oppression I read on social media. Women are oppressed, men are oppressed, blacks are oppressed, whites are oppressed, Asians are oppressed, Native Americans are oppressed, animals are oppressed, Indians are oppressed, Muslims are oppressed, illegal aliens are oppressed--ENOUGH ALREADY!


If you live in a western nation I have news for you--you are not oppressed, and most likely have no idea what the word means. In fact, if you have ever typed, spoken, or felt oppressed, you have no idea what the definition of the word is. If you have the freedom to type the word "oppressed" and you feel as though you are, you should consider some psychiatric help for whatever ails you.


You are not oppressed, nor have you ever been such. Perhaps things have not gone your way in life ('cause, I mean, it's life after all), and you have blamed others (IE. groups, genders, et al.) for your situation, then you should take a few moments and reflect on the true and very real reason you are where you are. Maybe you made a bad decision, or the situation changed and you had little or no control over its outcome. This is not oppression; this is merely a situation, and situations change in the blink of an eye.


So, here I am, a white male lecturing you, the oppressed, on how you are not being held down by "the man." Evidence that no one has their old, rich, white foot on your neck is all around you, but you refuse to accept responsibility for your own decisions, actions, or lack of both. I cannot count the number of successful (insert the minority, whatever that means today, here) people I encounter on a daily basis that are not old white men. Salud to you, my non-white male successful friends! Guess who is happy and ecstatic you are where you are in life? This old white guy, that's who.


There was a time, when I was growing up, that kids played with each other regardless of skin color, financial status (kids have no financial status by the way, their parents do), the bikes we rode, or the shoes we wore. The only sense of entitlement we had was who got to run down a trail in the woods first or who got to be on offense during the first dodge ball game of the day.


Social media and the internet are fabulous tools, but I fear it has become a detriment to society as a whole. Only on social media can you surround yourself with likeminded individuals without recourse, restraint, or recrimination. This is a shame, my friends. Having real face-to-face conversations is a lost art today. Putting your phone or laptop away long enough to listen (that thing you do with those two satellite dishes on the side of your head) to someone else's perspective is fading into the past like the sun at twilight. We have allowed people like Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg to control us, to take away our humanity and replace it with a keyboard and the ability to "block" anyone so retarded as to not respect or understand our personal point of view. Yes, yes, I realize I used the word "retarded" and it is not politically correct, is probably offensive, and will likely lead to someone feeling repressed or oppressed, but what the heck--the word is still in Webster's dictionary, so it is free game in my opinion.


I cannot recommend enough turning away from our electronic lifestyle long enough to talk to another human being. Go outside and talk to your neighbor. Do you even know your neighbor's name/s? Mow your lawn, burn a burger on the grill, but for God's sake--put the phone down and talk.


Note: Howard Upton loves the internet, voicing his opinion on various subjects, taking walks on sandy beaches, is a Capricorn, and a hugger. He is known to point and laugh when others trip and fall, but is quickly angered when others point and laugh at him when he does the same. You can reach him on his cell phone for a real conversation if you have his number, but you shouldn't get your feelings hurt when he is curt when responding to a text, because he despises texting and believes it is one of the downfalls of mankind.